IDENTITY

This week’s blog is for a special reason. Identity’s new member is from both the Deaf Community and the LGBTQ Community. To celebrate this new comer’s arrival I thought it was appropriate that we do an interview to learn new things from different types of communities and when various communities mix. So I interviewed this person and asked her some questions and these are her responses:

• Is being a Deaf LGBTQ member harder on you or easier for you to fit In with other LGBTQ members?

“First of all, I enjoy making new friends and they understand how to communicate with me. But it’s harder because I can’t catch up what everybody is saying and it’s hard to find an interpreter who is willing to volunteer. I hope identity would get an interpreter if any deaf/blind members want to come here.”

• What is your opinion on Identity? Do you find it helpful for you in anyway?

“I think Identity is a great place to show who you are and you can get support from here. However, if your family or friends are not supporting you, you would always have support group here.  I feel that I can be myself here and everybody is open-minded and they don’t judge anyone.”

• Would you tell more members of the Deaf/blind communities that are LGBTQ about this place?

“Yes I would.”

• If you have anything else that you want to say about Identity or anything that seem relevant please just go ahead and feel free to share.

“I think it’s a great place to make new friends who understand you. For me, I find it really awesome to know some of them go to same college where I attend. I hope, in future, identity would have equal access for everyone.”

Well to end this on a good note I would like to say this: Identity doesn’t care what communities you may come from we accept everyone. We like to learn more about the cultures of different communities so that we become more diverse so that we may be strong, stick together, work together and support one another. Thank you for reading this week’s blog.

Peer Educator @ Identity

Zachary Hooks

Last week, October 11, 2011, was National Coming Out Day. To support this holiday Identity held a Behind The Rainbow Wall discussion called “Taking Off the Mask.” In this discussion the ones that felt safe to share told their stories of  coming out and the out comes and the reactions of the ones they told. I shared a very small part of my story but to go into depth will show you what type of discussion we were engaged in today.

This January 2011, I was just finally coming to terms fully with who I was as a person. No one in my family but my sister really knew that I was gay. She really said she accepted me but her reactions in the summer showed her true colors. Meaning she showed me she really didn’t accept me. finally I decided that it was time for me to tell the rest of my family. So I couldn’t tell them with my own voice so I put it through a message sent through facebook. The message was met with harsh comments, disowning, and hatred.

I soon realized that my family that I thought would love me no matter what would never feel the same again. So I told my Grandmother and she immediately accepted me for who I was and has supported me ever since. I know people don’t always accept you for who you are and even the ones you love can be that way to. In order to have gotten through this ordeal i relied on my friends and the many relationships I had. I soon realized that I was getting into relationships only because I wanted the love that I lost out on from my own family. Finally the past 4 months I have slowed everything down and realized that was because I wasn’t loved enough. Now a days I rely on the ones that support me and show me the respect that every individual of the LGBTQ community asks for. Even though that coming out is hard once you do it does get better. You will find friends that will soon become like family. You will find places that will support you. There is people all around you that you have not yet met but will because you will realize there are more people out there in the world just like you who already understands you very well and most likely been in the same predicament.

This is one of the stories for supporting the National Coming Out Day. Share your stories in comments or visit Identity in Binghamton, NY if you would like to meet new people that are just like you or you are an ally to any LGBTQ individuals. The website for more information on this place is http://www.idyouth.org/

Please leave comments and i will get back to you if you would like advice or just want someone to hear your story. =)

Last Monday was the second annual teen drag show, the Teen Glam slam. Thanks to Merlin’s, a local gay bar, the teens had the perfect location for their fabulous show, and the bar even temporarily switched to a juice bar, which suited our family-based audience. New performers lit up the floor along with some veterans, but everyone had that floor moving. After the kings and queens had their moment in the sun, the floor was open for anyone to dance, and nobody let that opportunity slip. A few of us teens stuck around until 12-o’clock when the party finally came to an end.  All in all, the event was a hit. I’d go as far as to say that it was even more successful than the first one, and I have hopes that it’ll get even more popular next year.

June is Pride month in the City of Binghamton, and Mayor Ryan is again planning to Raise the Pride flag over city hall.  Press releases have gone out about events planned for Pride, and hopefully, there will be some news coverage of Pride events.  As a proud and active member of the LGBTQ community, I’m proud of this city and it’s government for celebrating this month with us; for celebrating the people of this community and all of the contributions made by the LGBTQ citizens here.  I’m proud of the strong, brave history of the community, of the humor and resolve and diversity, and the hearts and minds we open when we live our lives with pride.

            As we enter into this month of celebration for the LGBTQ community, I’m thinking back to last fall, when it seemed that every week another gay or “different” kid somewhere in America took his own life because of bullying.  The news was shocking and sad.  Somewhere, a movement was created where everyone was to wear purple to raise awareness and support for struggling gay teens everywhere.  Then, as we tend to do, we got distracted by new headlines and forgot to notice when gay kids continued to take their lives. 

            This morning, while reading the paper, Zach Harrington was on my mind. Zach was a 19-year-old gay teen who committed suicide about a week after attending a city counsel meeting in his hometown.  His family described the atmosphere of this meeting as “toxic.” The discussion over whether or not the city should recognize October as LGBT history month featured a parade of citizens taking their turns to speak their minds to the city counsel about how this proclamation would allow the gay community to infiltrate the schools and recruit kids.  City counsel members who voted to allow this would have trouble getting elected, they said.  Numerous people cited the bible as the primary reason why they opposed this idea.  I hope that if you asked these people whether they intended to harm Zach with their opinions, they would adamantly deny it.  They would cite their strong values and beliefs and their intention to protect the ideals that they hold so high.  Maybe they would talk about their own children and how they want to protect them from ideas that would harm them or encourage them to adopt an unhealthy lifestyle.  Probably, at least I hope, they were not acting maliciously that day, in their minds.  But anyway, Zach heard his neighbors speak.  He got discouraged and depressed.  He decided to end his life.

            I hope that other people will think about Zach when they start to type their responses to the letters to the editor regarding gay marriage, or the blurbs about the Pride picnics.  But I’ve been around for a while, and I know better. 

            So, what I want to say to you guys, is that I have no doubt whatsoever that when news of Pride events appear in the Press and Sun there will be comment after comment about the gay agenda, and what god wants or intends, or what’s natural or unnatural.  You’ve heard it all before.  It’s unoriginal, tired and uninspired, but it might still make you feel a little sad.  So don’t read it.  When you stand outside of city hall next Friday, don’t pay attention to the people across the street with their silly Adam and Steve signs.  They don’t matter.  Think about your good friends, and teachers, relatives, volunteers at Identity, all the people who speak out in support.  Think about the gay adults you know who have jobs and homes and families and happy, healthy lives.  Think about your future and possibilities ahead of you. Pay attention to that flag and the message it brings:  You belong in this community.  LGBTQ people have done great things and are an asset to our country and our community in so many ways.  You are important.  You are loved.  Today and every day, there are so many reasons for you to be proud of who you are. Happy Pride!

Love, Erin

So, I was a little upset to find out that alot of people, outside of those who come here on a regular basis, refer to Identity as, “The Gay Place.”  I find this to be really misleading, see as many of the people who come to Identity aren’t gay identitified, and on top of that, all of the topics discussed here are relevant to anyone.  If people can’t stop thinking of Identity as, “The Gay Place,” they might overlook a different title, “The hang out,” or in my case, “Home.”